Thursday, April 16, 2009

Because women hit on each others boyfriends / husbands


Men and women both want power.


They don’t want it all the time, it doesn’t define them always, but everyone in our culture succumbs to the temptation to be powerful.


To be powerful means to conform to superficial sources of power. For man this is money and status, for women this is beauty.  Every woman has felt the exhilaration of being the most beautiful woman in the room, and every woman has felt the sting of being the ugliest woman in the room.


When a woman looks beautiful, the taxi driver treats her differently. In fact everyone, from the waitress, the work colleagues and the boss right through to your kids, your husband and your neighbor treat you differently. You gain a kind of power you didn’t know existed.


It is tempting to want this power all the time; Particularly when you feel self conscious, down in the dumps about yourself or worst of all, unattractive.


This is when a woman will become ruthless in her search for the power of beauty. No where is that affirmed with more supremacy than in stealing your best friends boyfriend or husband.


Not to sleep with them... not even to kiss them. No your best friend would NEVER do that (unless she’s got a major self esteem problem). No she wants to borrow him for awhile. She wants to flirt, touch feet under the table when she's been invited over to dinner, and take a ridiculously deep interest in his football jersey collection.


The self esteem boost gained from your best friends husband's head being tuned, is akin to the cover of vogue. You may not be the worlds most beautiful woman, but at lest your more beautiful than your best friend. You may not be able to get a man, but at least your not with a horrible lecherous man like your best friend, whose husband cant keep his eyes off your breasts every time you wear that low top with the push up bra and shuffle your boobs all night, talking about last night in bed with the guy you picked up in the bar because sometimes you just need meaningless sex.


When it comes to a self esteem boost, almost no woman on the face of the earth can resist the eye of her best friends’ man; because that is the ultimate judge, and he's telling her, she’s better than his wife.


Which is of course a win for the man too, because in one swoop he can interfere in the relationship he fears most; his wife’s best friend.


In romance novels, the best friends never ever take off with the man, unless she is really villain and she is being established as such; which will ultimately result in a scene where the hero rejects her while she is naked in a bed and the heroine is watching without either of them knowing.


In romance novels, the hero is like a brother to the best friend, and the best friend is lovely, but like a sister to the hero. He’ll do anything for her, but he couldn’t IMAGINE looking at her in a sexual way.


He’s just not like that.



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