Saturday, May 09, 2009

Because women need to redecorate

Woman painting a wall rear view

When a woman has a problem in her life – I mean a serious, problem that requires a life altering solution – she will go to enormous, remarkable lengths to not have to do anything about it.

She will buy new clothes, she will dress the baby in a new way, she will find new friends, take up yoga, and if none of these things work, she will redecorate.

Redecorating for a woman is the same as nirvana for a Buddhist monk. It is the closest to perfection she will ever attain. No wall scratch goes unnoticed; no outdated frill will be ignored. A woman will use all the powers of her mind, intuition, body and soul to produce a Zen like change in the room.

The theory is; if the environment has changed, then I have changed.

Try very hard to never get between a woman and her desire to redecorate. You will only get hurt. Usually husbands will ‘allow’ their home to be transformed in this way, because everyone is trying to avoid the deep truth that is being hidden by the desire to re-decorate. There will be the ceremonial trip to the local hardware superstore, the busy buying of paints and brushes; all under her command, because it is a relief to see her happy and talking to everyone and the crises we all thought was coming has been averted for another day.

In romance novels problems women have to deal with are dealt with. Women rarely have time for phobias, complaints or unexpressed desires, because their needs are met and they know what they want. Their lives are fulfilling, exciting and fun, and tasks like redecorating are left to little moments of aesthetic pleasure or not dealt with at all.

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