Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Because women use 'nice' as a weapon of mass destruction

pouty blonde

Women are nice.

This is a rule of the universe. Despite overwhelming evidence against it, despite every fact available telling us the contrary, despite no woman in the entire world in every culture who has ever lived actually being very nice, we still believe this to be the case.

If a woman is being nice to you – it’s a trick. There is something she is getting out of it, whether it is something as basic as a roof over her head and food on her table or whether it is greater than that – like a chance for revenge against someone else, a move that will help get her husband a better job or a way to manoeuvre her children through life.

For women, nice is a tool. It’s a way of gaining things. It is not a natural state. She has to work at it. At first it’s easy, because she’s taught from an early age that it will get her positive recognition. The thing she learns most of all, is that when she is nice, she reinforces something that people want to believe is true, so she will be rewarded, protected and receive power. But when she is older, and life is teaching her that those rules don’t always apply, nice is harder to achieve.

When a woman becomes a master of nice, she can give it and take it as she pleases and leave you very cons=fused as to why you feel so bad. She will come in strong, and be so sweet in her communication and smile so gently that your guard is down and you become very vulnerable. That’s usually when she’ll go in with her sweetest insult, her nastiest observation and her most viscous advice about who you should be.

In romance novels the heroines are good women, but they are rarely nice. They may be empathic, strong, defenders of their family, thinkers, accomplished, warm, loving, nurturing and beautiful, but they are never nice. And the very intelligent women who read these books, love the honesty, and relish in the opportunity to not have to be nice anymore.


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