Sunday, June 21, 2009

Because men have poor personal hygiene

men has thrust a finger in the nose

A watched boil never pops.

I know this isn’t always true – and these days it is getting better than it ever was before.

However, men still seem to think of dirt as some sort of status symbol. Whether it’s under the nails (you’ve been fixing the car all day) all over the clothes (you’ve been playing football in the mud) in the hair (you’ve been ‘working’ in the underground cellar) or all over the face, men see the dirt they’ve been able to accumulate as some sort of sign of superiority.

The dirt all over the clothes and body is not an appeal to women.

It’s an appeal to other men. (Raises eyebrows)

In fact, the message of the dirt all over is “I don’t care about the Nancy rules women impose. I am a real man and I can be dirty if I want to.” Again, we see here the odd logic of male mythology that states doing something that appeals to women is gay, while doing something that appeals to men is straight.

However, worse than the self righteous ‘dirtier-than-thou’ group are the ‘just-didn’t-feel-like-washing-today’ group. This group usually manages to repulse both women and men.

This one is very difficult for women to understand. It’s the sweaty guy on the packed train whose never heard of deodorant, it’s the guy picking his pimples and boils at his desk, it’s the guy leaving the skiddies all over the bowl and it’s the guy picking his ear wax with his fingers (and eating it in the case of the Australian Prime Minister).

Do they not know that we can all tell? Do they not care that we all know? What is the deal here? Why skip your showers? Do they have no sense of smell?

Often these are the very men who will speak up at the worst possible moment contributing to a conversation they weren’t invited into, to make the point that women are hypocrites because they don’t go out with ‘nice’ guys. They will say they ‘tried’ it and nada! It never occurs to them that they could try being attractive.

In romance novels the most masculine, alpha male will die of humiliation if an offensive odour is excreted from any part of his muscled, toned body. It simply never appears in the novels. Women do not have to deal with unclean armpits, feet, hair or genitals / genital areas. To live, even for the briefest of times in this world, is ecstasy and lust for a woman.

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4 comments:

  1. You probably have not noticed that men are very disenchanted with womens attitudes and self importance. It seems hopeless because they do not have the mental introspection to notice the grandiose self image they have of themselves. They do not realize that the self image is a product of their own imagination so they never question its validity and continue to only think of their looks and not how they feel to a man.

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  2. [...] is like this in the workplace as well. Men will avoid putting systems in place, they will avoid setting up accounts, they will avoid all [...]

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  3. Personal hygiene is of utmost importance. It is fairly inexpensive to keep yourself groomed properly. And it is beyond my understanding why this practice is not embraced by all. Just sayin'.

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