Thursday, September 17, 2009

Because women re tell stories over and over again

Friendly chat

Once is never enough.

Twice and there may be a chance you think there are two versions to this story.

No, to really plant her version of events home, to really make sure those neural pathways are cemented in the direction she wants, she needs to tell you this story over and over again.

If you make any kind of gesture that you may be sick (to death) of this damn story – she will move on to the next person. Women have a bizarre ability to be able to sit out a story that is important to them with athlete like commitment to the repetition.

Of course there is no evolutionary need for this – this is learned behaviour. The neurosis of one who knows they can’t be heard, and knows they are not thought worthy of decent listening. So they tell their version, with inadequate words, pretending to give an accurate rundown of events, but all the time they're cementing a position that:

- makes them look good

- makes someone else look bad

- shows off their remarkable powers of 'analysis' 

Other times it could just be that she’s so bored, she finds the story of the way her sister in law treated her at the family dinner last week infinitely fascinating because lets face it, anything is better than dishwashing and vacuuming. And for once, she’s the star.

In romance novels, the pace is fast so there is rarely the need for endless going over meaningless detail. Romance novels ARE the endless repetition of a version of how women fantasise the world could be. No woman who reads them thinks it is how the world is, nor do they really think it is how the world should be. They just like things to go remarkably their way every once in a while - if only in fantasy.


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