Sunday, April 11, 2010

Because men take silly problems from the last relationship into the next without learning anything



"And I wanted you to know,

That I never understood.

That although you said you'd go,

Until you did, I never thought you would."

Don McLean - Empty Chairs

I knew a man who had been married three times and divorced twice before the age of thirty, who used to say “I pick the wrong women.”

Now gentlemen. Let’s be honest here. Women are the easiest creatures to marry in the world and they will attract far more public humiliation than you when you divorce. So, my point is, if you have lost a woman from marriage – or any significant relationship – you may have at least 50% to do with it.

Which then beggars the question, why and how did it happen, and what did you do to cause that happening? Did you do anything to create dissatisfaction or difficulties in the relationship? Have you thought about this and analyzed your contribution to the demise of the marriage?

Women do this endlessly. If anything, women do this too much. Women will agonize for hours days and sometimes months about why their man left and what they might have done to drive him out.  However, men will blithely sate that the woman has caused this in him or that he has bad taste in women. As if the only fault in his own behavior that he can analyze is his inability to recognize good women.

And as far as most men are concerned, that is a very easy mistake to make and has no baring what so ever on the chooser.

In romance novels, the men are very enlightened. They examine themselves through their past mistakes; they work out what might have gone wrong with their negative situation and what they may have done to cause any hardship that they may feel. Women, for the most part write these “perfect” male characters, and the man that is genuinely interested in getting “a lot of women” would do well to examine the heroes in these novels, because they contain the keys to the kingdom!

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