Friday, September 02, 2011

Because men will wear cut-off jean shorts

These are just bad.


They rarely look good on women. I mean sometimes, some women can pull it off, but they are very rare.  Almost all the women who think they can pull it off can’t.

But men can never ever pull this off. Even if you think they can, they can’t. Even if you think your guy looks really hot in his cut offs – he doesn’t. It just looks – well – faggy. And not in that really cool ACTUAL gay-guy way. This looks just faggy in an ‘i-wish-i-was-brave-enough-to-give-it-a-go-just-once-but-i-never-will-because-im-not-cool-enough’ kind of way. 

Let’s collectively face it, shall we, and say the thing that we’ve been too scared to say out loud.

Cut off jean shorts are only for farmers who actually DO work so hard in their jeans they get frayed, genuinely. Shorts are kept for comfort, durability and convenience, never to be seen in public, never to be worn on public transport or in bars.

I mean – I don’t know – maybe you want to look like Andre Agassi.

Even worse than the cut off jean shorts is the frayed cut off jean shorts. Those ones that look like you tore them off yourself with your teeth. No no no no no!  Just say no!

These do not look good if you are tanned. They don’t look good if you are buffed. They don’t look good if you are gay. They never ever look good.

In romance novels cut off jean shorts rarely happen, because the bulk of women hate them, on women or men. There is a reason for this. Just as lots of people LIKE frank Sinatra or George Clooney for their sophistication. Sometimes popular opinion is right.

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